Dad's Perspective: I Wish
By Jonathan White, Triplet Dad
Originally printed in August, 2005

People talk about how fast kids grow up and how they miss so many of 
the things they used to do.  Well, there are some I really don't miss, 
like having to feed babies a couple times during the night while the 
rest of the world is sleeping.  I'd also probably have to include that whole belly 
button starting out as a tiny beef-jerky-looking-thing (really gross 
if you think about it).

We tend to remember all the "firsts".  The first word, the first step, 
the first day without diapers, etc.  Well, what about the lasts?

I wish someone had told me that this was the last bottle I was going 
to feed to my babies.  I would have remembered their satisfied smiles.

I wish someone had told me this was the last time I was going to pick 
up and burp my babies.  I would have remembered the soft innocent 
sound that never failed to draw a smile on a tired face.

I wish someone had told me this was the last time I was going to 
change a poopy diaper.  I would have remembered better how happy 
they looked once they were clean.

I wish someone had told me this was the last time I was going to carry 
my babies up to their bedrooms to sleep.  I would have enjoyed their 
weight and not been so much of a hurry.

I wish someone had told me this was the last time I was going to have 
to wash their little hands.  I would have taken more notice of how 
much smaller their hands were than mine and how protected they felt.

I wish someone had told me this was the last time I was going to brush 
their teeth for them.  I would have been sure to get each tooth a 
little cleaner and noticed how free their smiles were.

I wish someone had told me this was the last time I was going to 
swaddle my babies.  I would have taken the time to notice how secure 
they felt and how much they trusted me.

I wish someone had told me this was the last time I was going to kiss 
away a boo-boo.  I would have taken the time to notice the look of 
comfort on their faces and realize how much faith they placed in me.

I wish someone had told me this was the last time I was going to help 
with math homework.  I would have used a better example that meant 
something more to them.

I wish someone had told me this was the last time I was going to 
pick out my daughter's outfit.  I would have picked something prettier.

I wish someone had told me this was the last time I was going to read a 
bedtime story to all my babies.  I would have read a longer one with a 
timeless message of love and acceptance.

I wish someone had told me this was the last time I was going to watch 
them fall asleep in my arms.  I would have made note of that exact moment 
before spent the night watching them.

I wish someone had told me this was the last time I was going to carry a 
child too tired to walk any further.  I would have carried them further 
than the we planned to go and enjoyed it more.

No one has to tell me that this is the last time I'll not notice a last time.